http://media.putfile.com/Heal-Zeny-Itam-Plz

So, surprising circumstances is out to get me and stop me from drawing. I’ve been studying like crazy this week. (ok, with the occasional really really long breaks, which is why I was able to do the picture below) And my parents want me to go back home for reading week (which is normal… who the hell stays in residence with a whole week of school off? nerds) even though I wanted to stay so I can get drawings done and slack and read and do w/e I want. (o damn, I’m a nerd) So I would be at home without a decent computer for a week. What a waste.

Over the course of the past few______ (days, weeks, months, pick one), I thought of a lot of stuff that I really want to do. Mostly unacademic related… but some are academically related. Kind of like goals, or things that are annoying me because I don’t have time to do them. I thought I’d keep a list in case anyone want to suddenly remind me by saying HEY SHILIN WHERE THE HELL IS THAT NEW PIC THAT YOU SAID YOU’D DO or something along that line.

My lovers

.: CG a picture of Iriel (sketch ready to be cged).
.: anime north contest entry!
.: CG that salvation picture.
.: redo most of volume 1 of blackbird (script ready to be drawn out).
.: retone the rest of the pages in 300dpi.
.: write :)
.: write out those 2 song ideas I have on Reason
.: be able to draw a set of relevant pictures for an artbook ):

Unimportant things I MEAN academic stuff:

.: Practice really hard for jury and audition (YEA RIGHT)
.: practice sight reading mooorrreee (YEA RIGHT)
.: make feux follet and mephisto waltz into showoff condition (YEA RIGHT)

mebbe I’ll edit this later.

I finally get my sound working again. turns out to be random disconnection problems and confused drivers trying to compete for the job. With that said, I was able to record what I sound like when I sing along to a song so I can be considerate in the future when my roommate is here :) I sing funny because I sing like I am talking. Sometimes I get offtune too, but that was cus I was afraid to be loud cus people outside would hear and go like wtf.

Tuesday night I read my ass off for the history exam, yesterday I researched my ass off for my psychology project (didn’t need to study for theory), and now I am studying my ass off for the history exam part 2. Funny how I didn’t know I have 3 exams this week until last week. Perhaps I shall be more academically aware in the future. or not. Only one more day, Shilin! Only one more day until you can go crazy and go back to doing absolutely nothing productive! so hang in there!

http://www.compfused.com/directlink/1214/

hot damn, when I age a couple more decades, I’d expect this to be common affordable technology in the household :) Even though development probably haven’t been swift enough. But this is gonna be so sexy if i can play mmorpgs on it; sexy controls and zooming. (it will, of course, have to be accompanied by an mmorpg of unparalleled graphics, game play and zero lag ;) ) Drawing too. and music synthesizing. Too bad it says to be licensed by apples. o well! microsoft will steal it anyway.

my lovely backyard view… of other houses :D;

someone said it looks like a barn xD outlook on houses similar to mine behind my house!

my cat… getting tanned near our giant french window.

my other cat doing the same. I like the other one more though; she responds to me more :) sorry big girl!

(a few too many) people have asked me whether or not I will publish Blackbird, and so confidently said that they will buy a copy if I do. All my responses have been no, because the quality at which I have done the entirety of volume one:

1. varies too much in style.
2. are saved in low resolution/quality formats.
3. are done in weird, non-standard page sizes.

So even if I want to, I won’t be able to get it in print.

Not unless I redo most of it.

I did think about it for a bit, because being able to have my own creation in a book form (I really wanted an artbook before, but my art changes too much and I become unsatisfied with them very, very soon after) is just too tempting. After looking back at volume 1 for a little, I thought that I have to redo at least up to page 70 or so if I want to print it off without regretting. Luckily most of volume 1 is done in pencil, so for higher resolution files I just need to rescan (omg all 170 pages!!) and pencil-tone the last 10-20 pages that I digitally toned, just for consistancy. But the redoing part… that’s gonna take a couple of months of dedication, and as much as I want to do this for the cool factor, I personally despise redoing things, especially drawing and writing.

So eventually I thought I could get this done in the summer.

It was really funny how a number of inquiry e-mails/notes could get my hopes up so much. I always have crazy ideas, but I am always afraid to be ambitious, because it comes with a sharp fragrance of egocentrism. (whether or not that’s a word….) But I’ll never succeed if I never try…

so maybe it’s time for me to start making a fool of myself.

I thought of deleting my DA journals once and for all because I don’t use it anymore; but I ended up reading my old journals and decide against it. I wrote so frequently back then, with uber long and “complicated” entries full of the randomest thoughts that hit me when my brain seizured, and they were interesting reads (only cus I wrote them myself).

There had been funny 1-line “wisdoms” and 10-page definitions of life. I had fun rereading my 1337 entry, as well as my super political standpoints. Most of those were all written when I was still stuck in grade 12… surprisingly not much was actually based on stuff that happened in school, which makes me think that, in comparison to the update rate and content of my journals now, actual schooling made me think more. Right now all my journals consist of nothing deep down, but mere descriptions of stuff that happened that were funny.

That’s right… everything that’s important to me right now should be funny.

So many of my previous journals were anger-filled, feeling injust or depressed, or generally emo. I was just thinking that rant journals were stupid a couple of weeks ago, but now that I looked at my own journal I saw how I contributed to the category of teen-rants :) Maybe it was the “stress” I had back then. Most likely it’s because I moved out… not having to face my parents everyday eased out a lot of conflicts between us. Family relationships improved because they had less exposure to my badness since I went to university. That probably changed my mood a lot (to the positive end).

but I think this is probably also because I like to type… or write out what I think into long elaborate paragraphs such as this post, even though I am generally too lazy to sometimes. Sometime last year I started to be more careful about what I publicly announce to protect my reputation. Maybe it’s a good thing… but sometimes it’s fun to see the stupid things I’ve done in the past, or to watch myself change.

I’ll succeed in making a proper-looking poster one day.
I guess i’ll stick with this title even though a lot of people thought it was unoriginal/cheezy. but so is Blackbird, so they match! I’m trying to paint by basecolour refinement instead of lineart->fill colour->shade in. a lot of people do it this way and it reduces a lot of lighting problems so I thought it’d be helpful to try to learn this…

The glowing white blobs are angels; the yellow crap is fire; the place is a church. The lil person is Eqin.

alriiight despite what quite a few people would probably say (along the lines of “lol, is she making drama for herself as publicity :)” ) I’m gonna post this anyways. My first hater that transcends simple deviation comment hate: my first ever forum hate thread!

http://forum.deviantart.com/devart/general/576866/

I didn’t think it was any more than an average art theft with an accusation bonus at first when a copy of my pic was submitted. Despite calling me an art thief, he didn’t take the effort to copy the big version of my picture and submit it, and submitted the thumbnail instead… forgot to erase my sig too. I was kind of surprised that some people think that it’s self-arisen drama that I made to publicize myself. how many pagesviews am I gonna get from… say… sympathetic comments that come from people that saw my art stolen? so like he got 50 views maybe. I get 50 more people commenting on my page saying “aww poor shilin”? I believe I am making a big fuss out of this, but I only joke other people; I don’t take jokes lightly :l certain individuals would know my horrible temper when I get insulted.

So I turned into a laughing stock as people think I am grabbing attention in that thread.

……. and I’d also be so mad if he succeeds in the end against all odds. In getting me banned with verbal-attack proof.

*would rather be ignored forever than given negative attention that I am not responsible for*

http://animenorth.com/design.php :O
If I can make it I think I’ll try out and hope to win. It will be enough of an excuse for me to go to Anime North. IF it doesn’t conflict with my 230958 midterms, juries and papers x(